Monday, May 23, 2011


This was always meant to be a blog about adoption but I can't keep some things from seeping in. Emma's life is forever a part of our family. There are two dates our family hold very dear - Emma's birthday and the day she passed away. I will always feel the need to write about her on these days because truth be told - one of your greatest fears when your child passes away is that somehow, they will be forgotten. That the clock ticking will erase their memory from peoples minds.
 So, it is important for me to be able to write about her sometimes.
Thanks for hanging in's still our adoption story and wow we are expecting very exciting news this week! We also are working on something wonderful which we are praying will help other families adopting. It's an incredible time, we are thankful for the Father's hand in every step we take.
Yesterday was the six year anniversary of Emma girl passing away and the beast I have always called grief has relinquished its power over me.
Dread which was so overwhelming as the one year anniversary approached many years ago no longer haunts my mind. 
I have come to realize the anniversary of her death, and the peak of time passing will never erase her memory.   And I am overcome with yet another truth; the duality of meaning found in a person’s death date.  For those left behind, the death date signifies and ending.   
Truth for Emma looks very different.
May 22,2005 was her homecoming, the glorious day she returned to her Father, the who sent her – she returned to Him in a perfect body, free from pain.
I view May 22 in a whole different way now. Years ago the Lord showed me this TRUTH.
Yes, it's still hard sometimes - missing her. But TRUTH far outweighs sadness.
That day was a glorious day for Emma.
Our family spent the day together yesterday, everyone a little bit on edge but the day got better after we left the cemetery. I have come to realize it's always the anticipation of whats to come which is the worse. Once we released six balloons, watching them until we couldn't see them anymore, we were all okay.
A collective sigh of relief. We are okay. Emma is okay.
Life on earth is not is.
This is going to be a crazy busy week, Peyton graduates from elementary school (how did I get a middle schooler, when did that happen!!???), Eli turns 39 28 (ha) tomorrow, and lastly, the
we have on the way!!!!

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