Thursday, April 26, 2012

Growing Wings

I love the recklessness of faith. First you leap, and then you grow wings. - William Sloane Coffin

A year ago, on April 26th, 2011, we had no idea what was coming the next day.

On April 27th tornadoes raced across our state, destroying just about anything in their path.

One statistic is 226 Tornadoes that ONE day across the southern states. It was a day we will never forget. 

And a day my faith took yet another step.

But a year ago on April 26th my mind was thinking about Emma and the upcoming anniversary of her death, not the storms which were making their way to our area. I was in a race to finish up adoption paperwork and we were struggling with adoption funding, family problems and the enemy was definitely on the prowl. 

One year later my heart is still heavy over many things. Once again, we are on racing toward the upcoming date of Emma passing away. It will be seven years on May 22. It is a bittersweet day. I miss her with a longing I can't really put into words. But there is also peace which transcends all earthly understanding.

A year ago my eyes had been opened and my heart broken in a way it had never been. 

 I was thankful for opened eyes. For it brought me to a place where I could say

 "whatever comes God, I am here. 

Break my heart. 

Send me. 

Show me."

I had no idea I was growing wings.

My heart continues to break over the children we said goodbye to in Ukraine. So many little faces, desperate for attention. Love. Over the months God has shown me children here in the US, and ALL OVER the world who need homes, food, clean water. 

Love. Compassion.

I pray God will continue to break my heart for what breaks his. This is not always easy. Who wants a broken heart?

But I would rather be completely broken than Lukewarm as I once was.

A year ago we were on the brink of climbing on a plane and journeying across the Atlantic.

We had no idea of what was to come.

It indeed felt like recklessness of faith.

We took a leap.

And God grew our wings.

So thankful we said YES.

We will GO.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Sveta's Turning FIVE = Matryoshka Madness!

We can hardly believe it!!! Our little one, Sveta Josie is turning FIVE!!!

And it's Matryoshka madness here. (for me anyway)

Birthday plans = A mix of American and Ukrainian, to celebrate Sveta's birth country and America. 

Birthday theme....Matryoshka. 

I LOVE these!

We brought many of these back from Ukraine and they are a cherished part of Sveta's heritage.

I suppose I need to do a rewind....

Life has been full of surprises and very busy the past nine months. Okay so that is an understatement. I don't even have the energy to write here or think anyone is reading but have realized this blog is really more for Sveta than anyone else. Little gets written here because well...I haven't had the words to really convey life after adoption.

I guess I should.

She is an incredible little JOY.

See the green fingernails? She chose them for St.Patricks Day. Mouth full of water after soccer? Happy baby girl.

I have tried to find a word for Sveta now, for her spirit, her energy...and it's


Sveta carried so much on her little four year old shoulders when we first met her last June. Things we will never know. Sveta is a fighter, our brave little girl. She has walked a journey most children will never walk. We love and respect the ones who cared for her and loved her her first four years. 
There are many special people God brought into her life. We know he has an amazing plan for Sveta.

 That day in June when I first took her little hand in mine and she looked up at me I promised her, I will


And neither me or her daddy will ever let go of Sveta.

She is our little girl. We knew it over a year ago.

It's just that simple. 

She is Beloved. Adored. Cherished.

Hugged. Kissed. Tickled. Snuggled. 

We wipe tears, fix boo boos. Listen to fears,encourage dreams. 

Absorb her.
And now we get to CELEBRATE her turning five!
 Sveta Josie joined our family last summer but she has been a part of our life for over a year.
Isn't God beyond comprehension in the way He works, and His timing?

He knew a year ago in we were dying Easter eggs praying Sveta would be here soon...

That this April 2012..
She would be creating her own Easter egg, here with us. Learning about tradition along with how her Father in Heaven loves her.

"Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth"

 And now here we are. A year later.

Planning a huge birthday celebration for a SPECIAL little one. 

She has no idea what a birthday party is. 

She has seen children in her class have cupcakes for their birthday so that is what she asked for.


That's it.

Pink and Purple.

Nothing else. (well also a dream lites pillow pet thing....)

She has no idea what a


her FIFTH birthday will be! 

and that this is

Her FIRST birthday celebration. 

She has helped pick out the clothing though...

With her own adorable outfit...from a talented mama at Rock A Bye Babes


I am beyond excited about all the awesome plans for Sveta's birthday.

There is Matryoshka Madness in the air.

With a mixture of American flavor.

Think hotdogs, rock candy, inflatables and matryoshka cupcakes.

Maybe some varenyky (perogies) or cabbage rolls? I loved both while in Ukraine. Eli...not so much.

Can't wait till June.

We have loved every first with Sveta Josie and are blessed to see life through her eyes.

I promise more updates to come. (really)